When things happen to me I talk. I talk and talk and talk and talk. To anyone that will listen. Not because I want to spread rumors or put other people down, but because talking about stuff is the way my brain processes why things happen. I like talking to all kinds of people from all kinds of backgrounds because each of them offers a unique perspective that can help with the healing process.
Sometimes it’s not about healing, sometimes it’s just about sharing. Sharing things we heard or learned about ourselves or others is just one way of checking in with each other. Am I doing this right? I heard so and so was doing it this way, what do you think of that? It doesn’t need to mean that I want to talk shit about another person because I need to put them down. It means I want to check in and understand how this world operates. You might call that gossip, but I think that’s a B.S. way to discourage people from sharing their true feelings.
As a culture we have this incredible habit of completely squashing each other’s feelings and invalidating each other’s experiences. Instead we should live freely and openly as needed. Share if that’s what heals, don’t if it doesn’t. Don’t judge those that crave connection via common experiences and feelings.
As mothers especially we need to foster communal relationships and support systems. How else are we to do this other than sharing? What this all boils down to is that I am fed up. I am fed up with women treating each other passive aggressively. I am fed up with mothers not supporting each other in times of need. I am fed up with the facade that we create to maintain perfection in society. Share unapologetically, share and discover that you are not alone.